Oh, Beautiful!
by beneath the lies
Summary: - - "Go on a date with me. It's an order." "Sorry, Sherlock, but I told you I was a lesbian." - - Megurine Luka hates her superior more than anything, and tries to annoy the crap out of him. Gakupo, however, thinks that she should make love, not war. G/L.


A/n: This is just the prologue, so relax... The next few chapter is where the humor kicks in.

Disclaimer: I don't own Vocaloid, not now, not in the future, and I never will. There, all big and clear, so don't sue me for whatever reasons you have! I'm broke... Oh, and I don't own Barney. -Grins-

Warning: Just for one word in this chapter, and it's the last line.

* * *

**Oh, Beautiful!  
**

**Prologue: How Megurine Luka ended up working for him.  
**

* * *

A very slender and pale body stirred in the queen sized soft bed, tossing and turning around wildly. Things like the alarm clock and the stack of paper on the small desk beside the bed were thrown off to the floor with one powerful and forceful kick. Inaudible and indecent words were all the while unconsciously escaping from the lips of the slender figure. The figure was grasping the snow-white bed sheets with so much force her knuckles were turning white.

Her face was starting to turn a little blue, and her limbs were shaking almost too violently. Her fists clenched and unclenched themselves, transferring the sweat on her palms to the now-wet bed sheets. Her silky soft strands of pink hair were now drenched with her own perspiration. She sank her teeth onto her bottom lip, grunting a few sentences here and there.

"N-No!" A scream managed to make its way out of the woman's throat. Her eyes instantly fluttered open, revealing shiny, wide ruby eye orbs. She sat up on the bed, panting and desperately clutching her stomach for more oxygen. One of the drops of sweat dribbled down from her forehead to her chin, making its way slowly towards the clear white bed sheets.

Her eyes moved to observe her surroundings slowly. The white curtains were fluttering madly, strong gusts of wind snaking its way through the partially closed tinted windows. She could hear the strong and mighty howls of the wind calling out to her, almost as if they were singing a sweet little lullaby for her. Her erratic and uneven breathings eventually slowed down to become more controlled.

"Just a nightmare, Luka," She spoke, air escaping from the gap in between her lips. She moved her hands up to where the source of the sweat were, and wiped them clean off.

Luka ran one of her hands through her wet hair, and twirled a few strands of them around her finger. She stretched her legs and straightened her black nightgown with a bored expression; it was a weird switch, and people would wonder how she could be so afraid, then almost emotionless next.

With a soft sigh, she launched herself back to the comfortable bed and spread her hands out, almost looking like she was reaching for some invisible, nonexistent thing. She licked her dry and slightly cracked lips, successfully moistening it and filling it with a different shade of pink. She glanced around her room, wondering what time it was-

The time... The_ time_.

Why did it sound as if she had something to do later on?

"The time!" Luka yelled, jumping out of bed in a flash. It took her forever to notice the broken clock she had knocked over lying on the floor. She made a dash to it, leaning down to retrieve it, and checked to see if it was working with a few knocks at the back. The supposedly blank screen was suddenly filled with an accurate reading of the time.

"It's seven-thirty in the morning…," she repeated to herself, scratching on her chin with her slim little finger as if she was searching for something hidden inside her memories. Then, almost immediately, her pupils dilated, and her lips were shaped into an odd circle shape. "Seven-thirty! Today was supposed to be my first day as a secretary... First impression is always important… and I'm horribly late!"

Nobody would be surprised by how long she had managed to sleep, though. She could sleep from morning till' the next night, and nothing would even wake her from her slumber. She was a heavy sleeper even though she looked like those people who would rarely sleep- Ahh, yes, those... nocturnal people.

"Great... Great, just _great_!"

With another scream, she rushed towards the closet, revealing a wide range of colorful and brilliantly designed clothes. She grabbed the sleeveless gray blouse accompanied with a single white tie, and a matching gray skirt that had a strange cutting on its side, partially revealing the wearer's thighs.

She sauntered to the next room and began to prepare for her first day at work.

**

* * *

**

Megurine Luka was already well prepared for the worst things to happen. She had already carefully prepared an 'introduction' script just in case she could not bring herself to talk to anyone at the office. She had stuffed the wrinkled piece of white sheet in her pocket even though it was bulging out. Well, as long as she would successfully show the people at the office how sweet and caring she was, then the attire and grooming aspect wasn't important to her at all. She really didn't have enough time to change into something much more formal and brilliant, anyway.

She could talk, but she didn't want to shoot her mouth off at anyone she saw. Megurine Luka had the tendency to offend people during their first meeting. She vaguely remembered an incident in the past whereby the client had been offended by Luka's rude words, and had threatened to complain about her lousy performance to the higher-ups. She was extremely pissed off about the event, that was for sure, and she didn't quite get why that woman of the rich family had to be so whiny over some of her comments about her atrocious attire. It was, after all, just her own personal opinion, and also some pretty good suggestion on what that spoiled brat could change into the next time they met.

Of course, Megurine Luka never had the chance to see that whiny woman again. She was fired from her work, and chased out of the office when she had refused to leave.

She began to count the number of ants crawling under her feet. They were just small, pitiful creatures who couldn't even defend themselves when humans wanted to blow their brains off. Just a small, quick step on them and the ants would die instantly. There would be no resistance from them, and they would even have to accept their fate. "One, two, three, four..."

They were just like her.

It was the golden rule in the society, wasn't it? It was a well-known fact that people of a higher status would often manipulate and control those of an insignificant status. The people with insignificant statuses wouldn't be able to resist if the higher-ups decide to get rid of them. They had simply no say at all. It was just like her, she had no status in this society at all. It was always like this. "Five, six, seven..."

Yet she was here, working and struggling to make her life a million times better, to prove that even the most insignificant people in the whole world could be one of the highest, strongest and most respectable person ever. Luka wasn't going to count on using despicable means as much as she wanted to, because it just sounded so tempting and easy to her. Instead, she was going to pin all her hopes on her hard work, and reap whatever she would sow. Therefore, she would try her best not to offend anyone anymore. It was the only way to survive, before she could make it all the way to the top.

Then they would pay.

Megurine Luka brushed the few strands of her hair away from her eyes and stood up when she saw the bus came into a sharp halt in front of her. She took the last remaining coins in her black leather purse and toss it casually into the machine beside the driver. She could sense the driver glaring at her, but she wouldn't even bother to look back at him in the eyes. She just walked briskly to the pair of seats nearest to where the door was, and took a seat down.

A frown caressed Luka's beautifully shaped face. She glanced at the confined area she was at, and took her free time to take in more of her surroundings. There were some people crowding behind the bus, and she didn't even want to know why; she had seen a few of them grinding their hips into each other before she immediately snorted in pure disgust and turned around. Her eyes rested on a weird sign on the bus that read 'No Drinking Please'. The rule was further enforced with a dumb image of a stupid glass of red wine there, and a huge large cross overlapping it. Luka rolled her eyes and growled at how dumb it was to put that image of a glass of wine there.

She hated wine. It had to be the world's most nastiest thing. She knew the after-effects and drinking too much wine, and she didn't want to go back home with a red and swollen face. She didn't want to get drunk so badly that she couldn't even tell where her home was located. Worse of all, she didn't want to be harassed by some homeless creeps out on the street, especially when she was drunk, since she wouldn't know a thing!

Oh, and another last thing- When Megurine Luka drinks, something very… awkward occurs; her split personality takes over her body, and… Now, let's not go that far, shall we?

She could feel herself getting more and more grumpier as time passed by.

Megurine Luka decided to take her time to observe the scenery outside the glass window. There were a few green and perfectly-shaped trees outside, but those quickly blurred as the bus sped past them. The sky, which was supposed to only be consisting of snow, white and fluffy clouds, were a mass of light, striking blue. She couldn't even hear outside, even, since the only thing she could hear now, in this bus, was the stupid loud chattering of a few indecent and ill-mannered teenagers behind.

She tilted her head and looked at the exit of the bus located near her. It was the only thing she could look at, right now, to relieve her boredom. She felt the bus halt and stared blankly as a few passengers got up the bus slowly.

Luka jerked upwards when she saw a strange looking androgynous figure walked in, and made her or his way inside. There wasn't anything that attracted her to him, really, except for those contrasting strands of purple hair, which had been conveniently tied up in a high ponytail. That alone was enough to list him or her under the 'androgynous' group of idiotic people. That weirdo, Luka noticed, also had some black shades worn over her or his eyes… and she was actually wondering why that person would actually hide under a pair of shades when he or she was in a rotting bus like this one!

She watched with mild interest at how that person pushed his or her way through the crowd while swaying the hips from side to side. Purple strands of hair followed his or her act, attracting tons of attention from some of them. Not that Luka was particularly surprised, since that peculiar fool also wore some strange black clothes that resembled a robe.

"Oi, Luka," Luka could barely hear the soft whisper beside her as she continued staring mindlessly at the androgynous figure, who had already taken a seat five seats away from her. She could feel hot breath trickling her cheeks, and brown strands of hair tickling her face, but she paid no attention to it. She was gaping, and she hadn't even noticed. Perhaps it was due to the fact that she had never ever seen somebody dressed as strangely as… _that_.

"Oi, Luka, what are you looking at?" This time, Luka was snapped out of her thoughts and thrown back to reality. She turned her head to the side, and almost jumped ten feet high when she noticed a familiar brunette gazing at her. The brunette had her hands on Luka's shoulders, acting as support to prevent her from being thrown over to the other end of the bus when it started its engine. Behind her, she noticed, stood a familiar little twin-tailed woman staring at where she had paid attention to for the past few minutes.

"Nothing much," Luka answered flatly and emotionlessly. Meiko raised one of her eyebrows in suspicion and threw her head to where the androgynous figure sat before snickering. "What? I was just thinking of my new job… I wasn't staring at anything in particular; so don't get some nasty thoughts in your mind. … What are you guys doing here anyway, Miku and Meiko dearest?"

"Look, is that a woman or a man?" The woman Miku paid no attention to her question and pointed to that person from a few minutes ago. "I believe that person was who Luka has been staring at all the time."

"Oh, come on, I said I wasn't-"

"I'd say that person's a she. She's got a bust on her. Can't say that people who've busts are male for sure," Meiko answered back, grinning sheepishly at the curious twin-tailed woman behind her, and squeezing Luka's shoulder lightly. Megurine Luka frowned and uttered something in annoyance, wondering how they had even managed to change the topic in less than ten seconds. She wanted so much to push that hand of that brunette's off her shoulders, but she didn't want to attract any attention.

"Bust? Where's the bust- Ouch!" Another familiar voice was heard beside her, and Luka didn't have to look to know that it was Kaito who was speaking. If Miku, Meiko and Kaito were here, it would mean that Mikuo would also be here… And if Mikuo were indeed here, he would find out about her new job…

She couldn't risk that. Mikuo would probably tease the hell out of her and bother her to no end. After all, she was the one who had told Mikuo that she had no intention of working right now…

What were the usual four doing here, anyway? It wasn't like them to board the bus for no reason at all. Mikuo was stinking rich! He had a fine luxurious mansion, and a hot, shiny black car with his own personal driver, even! He could have just gotten the driver to send the four to wherever they wanted. It didn't make sense as to why they had to take a bus...

"Meiko, can you _please_ not be that direct?" She heard Miku sigh, and the rustling of some fabric could be heard. "Anyhow… That person's got to be a guy. He's got no bust, Meiko. He's a totally as flat as paper! You've been looking at the wrong things lately…"

"Oh, look, Rin's flat, but she's a girl. That person's got purple hair, too. What, pray tell, would a man gain by dying his hair purple? Oh, and the ponytail. Not to mention _her_ atrocious attire."

Kagamine Rin? Luka had heard of her before, but she didn't really know her. In fact, she hadn't met her before. From what she had gathered, however, was that Rin was a brilliant gamer while her twin brother Len, was a child prodigy. She might have to meet them sometime...

"You can't judge a person's gender by the hair color!"

"Oh, really? Then look at the chest, observe, and open up your big eyes. Do you see bouncy, floating balloons there? Cause I know I did, and I saw two."

"M-Meiko! K-Kaito's h-here!" Miku screamed, her face covered in different shades of red. Kaito was laughing hysterically, clutching his sides as he did so.

Luka was starting to get a headache from all of the yelling and shouting here and there. She noticed the weird gazes and curious glances that people had thrown to them, and she frowned. "Could you guys keep your volume down? People are staring... Oh, and where's Mikuo?"

Luka's effort came to a naught when all three of them- Kaito, Meiko and Miku started giggling out louder and louder. They were apparently laughing about how stupid the androgynous person looked like with his or her beautiful and gorgeous hair and that particular clothes he or she chose, that resembled a piece of bathing-suit. She sighed and decided to get herself away from them to save her own pride. Luka didn't want the public to be secretly taking photos of them, only to publish it on the net or on the newspaper next week. It was embarrassing enough for them to be insulting a stranger, but worse of all, they were laughing out so loudly their voices seemed to echo throughout the bus.

She stood up, and straightened her skirt, gripping on the nearest hand-grip she could find, to support herself from the wild and sharp turn. The three of them were still laughing their asses out. They hadn't even noticed that Luka was going to move away!

"Hey, you, woman over there."

Luka gulped and swallowed a little bit more air than necessary when she heard a voice call out for someone. It was kind of hoarse, and it was a little high-pitched. Kind of girly, yet also intimidating. It laid on the boundary between a man and a woman's. She stirred and eventually turned around to stare at where the source of the voice came from.

"Yes, you, over there."

Who was that person speaking to? It was that androgynous person from just now. He or she had his or her head turned to observe Luka, and Luka couldn't help but feel a little uncomfortable with how that person was looking at her. His or her eyes were moving up and down slowly, taking in the form of the mature woman who had stood up just a minute ago.

"You. It's you I'm talking to, woman."

Was... W-was he or she talking about her?!

She tilted her head innocently to the side and pointed a finger at herself, trying to verify if the person was indeed calling out to her. She noticed that the pair of shades the strange person had been wearing was already removed.

"Could you come over here for a second, lady?"

Why would that person call out for her?!

Megurine Luka inwardly cursed, clenching her fists in anger. If that person was going to pick a fight because he or she had noticed the way she was staring at him or her just now, then she'd give him or her a promising one. Of course, the best solution to tonight's problem was simply… 'Smile and kill'.

That would also explain why Luka was complying with his or her orders, slowly sauntering and pushing her way through Meiko, Miku and Kaito to where that person sat with his or her legs crossed, and his or her arms folded neatly across the chest. That androgynous person had his or her back leaned back against the soft seat. Those unfitting purple strands of hair were still standing out from the crowd and the surrounding area, though.

"Luka? What's wrong?" She heard one of her friends behind her ask, but she decided to push the question away. She could feel a dozen of eyes staring at her as silence took over. She didn't care right now, anyway. All she cared was those disgusting and vile pair of eyes that seemed to be lingering over her form, taking in whatever she had to offer to them.

"May I help you? Madam?" She asked politely, a sweet grin hiding all of her murderous intentions right now. She saw the person grumble some sort of curse under his breath, and her or his side of the lips twitching in anger. Raw anger was etched across his or her supposedly blank features.

"Madam?" The androgynous person spoke, and Luka willed herself to stare at the angry and blazing violet eye orbs. She wanted so much to punch that face and flee. "Did you call me madam? No, wait, did you just… Did you just call me a _woman_? A _woman_ of _all_ things?"

Oh, so that… _thing_ there wasn't a woman. No wonder he looked so displeased when she had addressed him as one. Well, she sure as didn't care right now, and she didn't want to cause any trouble for now. She continued gazing at the strange man there, and watched silently as he starting fingering the chain necklace he was wearing before giving him a proper answer:

"Yes, and mind telling me why you asked me to come all the way here, _Mister_? I haven't got any free time to spare, and you have just wasted fifteen minutes of my life."

"… What's your name, lady?" He asked, and Luka shot him a glare. He was examining her with half-lidded and lazy eyes.

"I don't think I should let you know. You seem to be a little, oh,_ I don't know_, mentally unstable. For wasting my time, and for persuading me to diverge personal information," Luka rolled her eyes and presented her annoyance with a short, loud, snort. She noticed how the both of them were talking so loudly right now. Even the driver seemed to be interested at what the two were trying to argue about.

"I don't think I've asked for extra information, lady," The man shut his eyes and before Luka knew it, a smug grin was already plastered on his lips. "I think I have only asked for your name. Are you a foreigner, or do you not speak English?"

Luka wasn't one of those very patient woman. She would normally ignore and let whoever provoked her off if they begged for forgiveness, but if they didn't, then she would be sending them personally to hell. This was probably one of the reasons why Megurine Luka found it hard not to offend anyone. What a ride!

"Just to let you know, young purple man," She was fuming right now, and the last thing she wanted to do was to start using her fists at somebody she barely knew! ... Unless he managed to force her into a corner, that is, and knowing Luka... That probably wouldn't take long. She towered over him, the pleasant smile taking over her face to hide her emotions. "I'm unavailable, and unfortunately for you… I'm not interested in men."

Thus, to make herself clearer and to make the impact on him stronger, she added on, all the while lying behind her teeth:

"I'm a lesbian, so don't mess with me, you hear?"

"What's. Your. Name."

She froze and glared daggers at the man in front of her. He was still grinning! He hadn't been affected by her false confession just now! And most of all, how _dare_ he speak to her like that?! Who was he, anyway? Did he think that he had the power to make her do whatever he wanted? His tone, his attitude and his behavior towards her were unforgivable!

That was it. Her fists were going to be next, if he doesn't shut the hell up.

"It's Megurine Luka, you dumb transsexual," she hissed sharply, her eyes narrowing into fierce and gruesome slits. The smile on her lips was long gone, and replaced with a long thin frown. Her eyebrows were furrowed in anger and confusion at how she was unable to understand and figure out this weird person's intention here. He called her to him for some strange reason, and she had no freaking clue why a stranger like him would want her name if he weren't planning on fooling around with her! "Now don't think you'll get away easily for wasting my precious time! I'll shred you into pieces!"

"Luka," Luka turned when she heard Miku's voice behind her, and her expression softened a little when she felt Meiko rub her arms in a comforting manner to soothe her anger. "Luka, don't start any trouble. It's... a public area, you know?"

She could hear the fear and nervousness in Hatsune Miku's voice. She wasn't that surprised, really, because Megurine Luka was well-known for her ability to bash people up badly, be it in terms of strength or wits and words, when she was extremely pissed off like right now. She couldn't help but feel a little guilty, though. It wasn't very nice to strike fear in others' heart. It would only make people shun away from her.

"Why, aren't you the self-conceited one," Luka heard the purple weird samurai-looking man in front of her say, clicking his tongue to further reinforce his opinion. Her expression darkened, and that angry scowl crawled its way back onto Megurine's face.

"It's a whole lot better than you, you barney looking homo-"

"-Luka! Stop this now. There's no point arguing here, with all the people watching!" Miku snapped, and Luka quickly shot her one of her infamous evil glares. "This woman here has nothing against you. I'm sure she doesn't mean anything..."

Megurine Luka stomped away from where her friends and that stupid purple dinosaur imbecile was once the exit from the bus opened. The last thing she could hear was the stupid crazed retarded purple fool yelling about how he wasn't a woman, just like before.

Stupid rude jerk...

* * *

She had walked all the way from that stop to the company she was supposed to be in, and that took her roughly an hour.

It was _his_ fault. That dumb _Barney's_ fault!

If Megurine Luka were to see him again, she swore that she would rip him out of his skin! That would teach him not to mess with somebody like her. She could be violent if she wanted to, but no, because it wasn't supposed to be good for her 'perfect gentle woman' image.

She waltzed briskly past a few of her coon-to-be colleagues, asking a few of them for the direction to the hotshot's office.

Soon, she arrived at her desired destination, coated in sticky sweat while panting and gasping desperately for air even though the whole area was air-conditioned. The whole place was huge, and her stupid soon-to-be superior had his personal office located on the highest floor! She didn't even know that he had placed a few of those security checkpoints here and there...

Why go through all the trouble? It wasn't like anybody was going to assassinate him, anyway. He wasn't the president.

She stepped closer and further into his office, admiring the scenery beyond the huge glass window at the other end of the room. The large table made of pure gold was shimmering and screaming with riches. There were a few potted plants by the side of the office, but Megurine Luka wasn't a fan of plants. A bookshelf made of a sturdy and expensive wood stood at the corner of the room, with exquisite designs carved on its surface. Luka almost fainted and gaped at the sight of how rich her superior was!

"E-Excuse me?" She tried to get the attention of the great figure sitting on his beautiful chair facing away from her (to the super large window), but all was in she would see, however, was a few strands of purple hair...

"Excuse me..."

"Hn, come in," an order was given to her through the short and curt response, and Luka muttered something inaudible under her breath in rage and annoyance. She stood where she was, not taking a step forward and ignoring what he had said because she _was_ already _in_.

"I said you can come in here. Oh, and you're late."

"I'm already in," Luka commented, rolling her eyes briefly. She was hoping that he would be kind enough to let her off for being this late on her first day of work, but it didn't seem like he was those forgiving ones...

She observed the man as he turned around slowly, his bright purple hair s-

Bright _purple_ hair.

"N-no... It can't be that... N-not my b-boss..."

On the seat sat the bright and vain little Barney from the bus just now, and he was smirking victoriously at her.

Shit.

* * *

A/n: This was originally supposed to be a one shot. Seriously. I wanted to continue, so I extended the whole thing.

I edited the whole fic three times. The first time was when I was planning to capture their encounter in a... pub. Next, it was at some stupid restaurant, where I was supposed to have Luka spill the coffee all over Gakupo, then Gakupo would be like, "compensate me NAAOO!~" But then I switched because I wanted Gakupo to have a different personality. I made him a weird person here, and yay, I made Luka hate him, yay! When I was finally going to submit this, I changed again to the final version, which was this!~ Some scenes were retained but others were removed. The fight was a new scene I added in, so it might be a little rushed...

I want more Gakupo/Luka! Luka is awesome. Pure, epic, awesomeness! Oh, and yes, the Kagamine twins are my favorites so you can bet that they are going to be playing some major role in this fic. The headlight still goes to Luka, though~ :-D

Please, **review**, for encouragement as well as for... Cookies? 8D~


End file.
